Ennui- a cute French word that’s fun to say. Say it with me - “on wee”. Isn’t that a great word? I will be the first to admit that this word was not in my vocabulary until very recently but it’s not to say that I didn’t recognize it all around me. The character Ennui from the movie Inside Out 2 helped me put a word to the emotion and a visual character to get the picture.
The character in the movie has perfected the look by dressing in dark colors, dragging around as a flat, spineless character, always being tired, rolling the eyes, using snippy, sarcastic one-liners to stop the conversation, and deeply sighing. It’s as if the air in the balloon has been let out. The look is a craned neck downward while scrolling mindlessly on the phone, avoiding eye contact. This teenager has perfected the art of not putting any effort into anything. They are too cool to care.
It’s fun to characterize this emotion with a funny cartoon depiction, but as with any comedy, there is a painful truth that can be anything but fun. Boredom can easily be correlated with mental health difficulties.
Ennui is not just something that teenagers have. I see it in the therapy room as it presents with a multitude of situations. Putting my newfound word into action, I can better describe the emotion. Let’s try using it in a sentence…
Ennui can show up as job burnout in the adult. This person might say, “After feeling such ennui working in an unchallenging position, I had to look for a new career”.
Ennui can show up as boredom in nursing homes. This person might say “The pain of living with such Ennui, such boredom is terrible”
Ennui can show up in a student whose school work can be tedious or pointless. This person might say, “This lack of stimulation is causing me to suffer from ennui”.
Ennui can show up with a professional attending a lecture that is boring. This person might say “the endless lecture produced an unbearable ennui”.
Ennui can show up in empty relationships. This person might say, “The ennui of endless days, weeks, and months is hard, and I have succumbed to ennui without love.”
I’ve seen people in spiritual crisis when they have a feeling of being abandoned by God or questioning the meaning of life experience a sense of ennui. There may be a meaningless worldview without a sense of hope. I’ve seen it look like melancholy, or discontentment with where they are in life. I hear it when I ask someone how they’re doing and the answer is always “I’m tired”. I see it in the therapy room with someone who may be diagnosed with an affective disorder like Dysthymia. The term “blah” or having a blasé attitude can be a sign of apathy. The DSM uses the word “anhedonia” to describe an inability to feel pleasure that can be a symptom of depression or other mental health disorders. While apathy and anhedonia are different from ennui, the outward symptoms may look the same.
This emotion can be a sign that it’s time to switch gears, try something different, get curious about something, or get interested in others. It may be a sign to take action and seek help. Therapy can be a useful tool to put words to the feeling. Now that we know the word ennui, let’s find a way to move out of the condition.